I may have just done something bad. And by bad, I mean potentially harmful to my relationship with my sister. I am really hoping that she won't be angry with me. Let me explain.
Over the weekend of December 17, my family all met at the halfway point between where my sister and the rest of us (Mom, Dad, Justin and I) live. I believe I blogged about it previously. It went really well, no snide remarks or hurtful comments, blah blah blah. Anyway. My sister's boyfriend, "B", and I got to actually talk for the first time... ever, really. And they're pretty serious about each other, or at least that's what I'm hearing from my sister, "K."
B told me about himself, including that his dream was to be a comic book illustrator, and he went to school for it for 2 years. I thought, COOL! and had a great idea. I asked him if he would make Justin, my Dungeons and Dragon playing, gaming, nerdy husband into a comic book hero. It could be this awesome poster, and could also include our household pets whom Justin adores, as his "sidekicks." Super cool, right? B and K seemed excited about it too, and B said that he could do it and asked me to send him pictures of everybody- Justin, Bear, Bennett, and Fox.
In the beginning of January, I sent out the email with pictures and descriptions of what Justin's outfit should look like, preferred weapons, etc. and asked if they could have it done by the end of January for Justin's birthday. K said that should be fine, so I waited until the week before Justin's birthday (last week of January) and emailed back asking about a date that it could be finished. No reply. I talked to K on the phone and she said that she reminded B about it, and he said, "Oh shit, I completely forgot! I feel like such an asshole," and that he began working on it that night. I thought, 'Ok, it might be a bit late for Justin's birthday but it's been started, so that's not so bad.' 2 weeks go by and still, I hear nothing.
I email back on February 13, asking if B could just let me know how it's going, if he can still do the poster or not, and if so, when I could expect it to be done.
I emailed again on February 20 (for those of you not wanting to count, I waited another week) and asked the same questions as I did in the last email. At this point, I just want to know if I am getting a poster or not. I told him that Justin had asked if I had been scammed, as he was still waiting for his birthday present.
So today (6 days after the last nice email I sent), I sent this:
I wish I had another way to contact you, but this is all I've got. Just forget doing that poster for me, it's way past when I wanted it and I have heard absolutely nothing from you about it. So I guess I am telling you that you won't hear from me again about it. I'm really disappointed, not just that I didn't get the poster, but that you have failed to say anything to me about it, even "I don't know" or "I can't do it." Either of which would have been fine, and much better than waiting for almost 2 months with no reply. I was really excited about this opportunity, but I would have understood if you had told me that you didn't have time, didn't want to do it, or that I would need to wait X amount of time for it. Perhaps you have a legitimate reason for not responding to any of my emails, but at this point I feel disrespected and angry that I wasted all of this time waiting for nothing. I really hope that you are better at communicating and more respectful to my sister than you have been to me. I don't like to bring her into this, except that she deserves to be with someone who will be a great partner and honestly, your complete lack of follow through on this endeavor concerns me. I apologize if there is some reason I have not heard from you that will explain what has happened here in a logical way.
Also, when someone emails B (at his business email address- by the way, he owns his own business- and it's the only email I have for him) I think everyone at the business (or at least my sister, who works part time for B) also gets the emails.
So I'm hoping she doesn't read it and get pissed at me, and/or that it doesn't cause a rift between them.
I feel like I wasn't too over the top, or hateful, or disrespectful, but I also feel like he needs to know how I feel about what happened. I also waited to write it until I was calmer about it (there was a day last week that I was absolutely furious, and wrote an extremely nasty email in my head).
A part of me is hoping that he reads it and sends an apology email stating that the poster is done and he's sorry for not saying anything sooner.
Another part of me is scared that he'll be pissed. Yet I am also halfway expecting no reply at all, simply a continuation of the non communication.
Which should be interesting if they come up to visit in April...